Along with my friends the mossies I have a pet rodent. His name is ratty. He visits me through a hole in the wall where, if the floor gets really dirty, I can sluice the wash water. He is quiet, very secretive and shy so I’ve only seen him twice. Once when I had visitors and he obviously took exception to this as he scuttled off almost immediately, and the second time he sneaked up on me when I was not paying attention. Being shy, as soon as he realised I wanted to say hello (or something to that effect) he did a runner on me. Now this upset me as I really wanted make his close acquaintance. Feeling utterly rejected I decided to take drastic action and issue a memorandum of understanding whereby sanctions would put into immediate effect. Well, immediate in terms of the Indian time scale. So over the next few days I pondered how best to deal with this unfriendly beast and came up with a wheeze. Block the hole up. Now the quick thinkers out there will say why so long for such a simple solution. Answer, because I’m a wrinkly old git and it takes ages to make the brain cells communicate with each other. But, I’m on a mission now and nothing will stop me until my global objective has been achieved. My first solution is finding a piece of wood and block the hole up from the outside. The flaw in that is that anyone passing by could easily kick it away. But it will have to do for now. A few days later I have a design amendment to make. Find a brick and place it against the hole on the INSIDE.
This is where I discover another riddle. Locating a brick is easy; the only problem there is that it is helping to hold a wall up. Do I knock the wall down or continue my hunt for an errant and solitary brick. The answer is obvious to all but the dim witted. Knock the wall down. Then I remember the landlord and his constant complaints about water overflowing and so on and so forth. Further, I realise if I knock the wall down ratty can come in whenever he likes so that idea is hastily abandoned. A few more days pass until the Eureka moment, I find a brick. I carefully clean the floor around where I am to place it and strategically position it to block the hole. Why clean the floor? Because this is a very special brick and not just any old building brick and I want ratty to know I have no ill feelings towards him other than to STAY OUT. Mission accomplished!